As you know recent events have caused Lisa to enjoy her life. Her husband, better known as SuprKyle, has returned home after fighting for the Freedom of Tim Horton's establishments the world over. Her once spinster sister got married and spawned. Frank continues to sit on XBOX remote controls.

These are indeed happy times for Lisa and her family... and we wish to put an end to them. For as little as the Canadian dollar trades on the forgein market, you can donate to the Let's Make SuprSlicr Miserable Again Campaign.

With your donations, we will hire a guy to follow her around and randomly bump into her, take the last coffee stir sticks, and even lick the door handles of buildings she intends to enter.

People in countries like Canada, the United States, and Australia who shut themselves inside their homes for no viable reason depend on her complaining about the outside world to use as an excuse to fend off the heinous attempts of friends and family to have them get some "sun" or "socialize." These people are also depending on you to make Lisa's life miserable once more by donating today.

You can donate in three easy ways.

1.) By leaving a non-descript envolope in the second trash can from the left on the north side of the Deep Sea Adventure in the West Edmonton Mall.
2.) By e-mailing your credit card number, expiry and name to khepra@thekheps.de (several charges will follow in varying amounts with varying names like The Sony Store, Best Buy, Future Shop, Petsmart and Wal-Mart. This is done for confidentiality purposes.)
3.) Or by simply handing large sums of cash over to our on the street associates, easily recognized by wearing all black and sunglasses in the middle of the night and standing in poorly lit areas.

Thank you for your time.